31st December 2017: Lift / Hunan / Friends Getting Together

Today, to be thankful / to be grateful,

for a generous lift into town.

for Hunan Chinese Restaurant, Manchester. Delicious food, big round tables, friendly service.

for friends getting together from out of town. For other friends turning up as a surprise.

30th December 2017: Old Clock TIcking / Altered Beast / Bump Into Friend

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the sound of an old clock ticking and the small variations in each sound.







for the design of Altered Beast

for unexpectedly bumping into a friend on a train.

29th December 2017: Stahl House / Old & Close Friends / Birdtracking

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for Stahl House. To quote Al Pacino in the movie Heat - “dead-tech, post-modernistic, bullshit house” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ErkyfDyi1BQ)  - I love this type of architecture. I know it is plain, but it is clear, and it is light, and it is relaxing. Stahl House is a grandiose example of it.

https://stahlhouse.com/

for sharing time with old & close friends and their hospitality.

for birdtracking, and the idea that you can find lifetimes of interest in a small garden. For the collective gathering of information to lead to a greater understanding.
https://www.bto.org/volunteer-surveys/birdtrack/about

for how I feel now is very different to how I felt just a few hours ago.

28th December 2017: Things I Miss / Jane Plough / Empty Town

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for accepting some of the things I miss in my life, the sadness of those empty caves. To know what is missing allows you to plan to live in ways towards finding what is needed. 

for the joy of life that is the character Jane Plough, performed exquisitely by Doon Mackichan. Doon is a wonderful name too.

for the feeling of walking through a town when no-one is around - moving across the roads and areas in different lines. Hearing your footsteps in relative isolation. Lights lit up all over for a very exclusive audience. Spaces for communion, community, gatherings rejected at these hours, on this day of the week, in this month, this year.

27th December 2017: Hospitality / Meeting People / Marvin Gaye's Voice / Quality Sound System

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for great hospitality from friends.

for spending time meeting and getting to know people of which I did not know.

for Marvin Gaye’s white suspended smoke voice.

for the luxury of hearing those recordings through an excellent sound system, really clearly defining the separate parts of the mix.

26th December 2017: Laying Flowers / The Lost Boys / Unrestrained Emotion

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for going with my mother to lay flowers on Holly & Mary’s grave in Polstead.

for the film, The Lost Boys.

for the most painful expression, relinquishing a cover that has been held.

25th December 2017: Calm Christmas / Lipstick / Loved Ones / Films / Gizmo / Gremlins

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for a calm and happy Christmas with my parents. I have a physical apprehension of days where my happiness is demanded - it often provokes a reaction to recoil or to feel otherwise. Birthdays, ceremonies etc. Anyhows - it was nice to breathe, accept it as another day, with extra time together and some lovely food courtesy specially made by Mum. Folks seemed calmer, more relaxed, and that’s always good.

for feeling inspired to draw with my black lipstick, and enjoying smudging.

for hearing from loved ones.



for sailing through 4 films in a day: Frida / Songs From The Life Of Leonard Cohen / Terminator / Gremlins (also, a little of Something About Mary, and a little of Home Alone)

for Gizmo’s sulking / feeling sorry for himself face.

and the ever-horror of Kate Beringer’s Christmas story. Gremlin’s is my favourite Christmas film I think.

24th December 2017: Albino Sparrow / Papyrus / The Reflecting Skin

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the albino sparrow in our garden, part of the gang but rocking a distinct markings.

for Papyrus. Support their work whenever you can.

for the film, The Reflecting Skin.

23rd December 2017: The Muppets / Uncle Helping / Dominique Fishback

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for The Muppets film (2011). A surprise stumble upon and it really got the day on a lovely track.

for my uncle helping my father with some odd-job work.

for Dominique Fishback, a great actor and screen presence. I'm excited for the future parts she'll perform.y.

22nd December 2017: Kedgeree / Retail & Hospitality Workers / Flow

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for kedgeree.

for all working at the coalface of the shopping & hospitality industries at this time of year dealing with consumer insanity.

for work taking on a flow, and riding on it, within it, but it starts carrying you.

21st December 2017: The Winter Solstice / Noé’s film Love / The People of Yemen

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for The Winter Solstice.

for Gasper Noé’s film Love.

for the people of Yemen. For all who are helping the people of Yemen during this tragedy - for all who are pressurising the mechanisms of their government into  helping the people of Yemen.

20th December 2017: Songwriting / Confrontation / Mum's Christmas Meal

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for really enjoying the last stages of writing/recording my songs. I love my songs. I love writing songs. I think everyone should write their songs. My songs might not be the best songs or the most needed, but they're my songs, they help me say what I need to say, they help me hear where I'm at, where I need to do work, where I need to learn, what I have experienced - and hopefully when I share them others may find a place for them too. Someone else might not write the song you need, you can write it. Music education for all. Language lessons for all. All kinds of education for everyone, free. So everyone gets the chance to mash it all together, share their vibrations.

for friend's who have confronted me to help me improve and learn.

for Mum really enjoying her Work’s Christmas meal.

19th December 2017: Wise Up / Family-Themed Newsletters / The League Of Gentlemen / Productive Hour

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for this song, for #Aimee Mann, for this scene, for this incredible film, for the cast and crew, for #Paul Thomas Anderson. There was a before and an after seeing this film in 2014 for me. Thank you to my friend in  America showing it to me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNmKghTvj0E

for Family-Themed Newsletters

for The League Of Gentlemen

for having a really productive hour after a frustrating day.

18th December 2017: Scaffolding / Walking-The-Dog Call / macOS High Sierra

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for scaffolding, confronting the sides of a building, forming outside floors.

for a walking-the-dog call from a good friend. Even though I was sitting still, it felt like I was walking the dog too, whilst talking. I’m a big believer in the stimulating effect of liminal or altered environments on the dynamics of conversations. Also, for the effect of moving across/through physical landscapes whilst conversing.

for the good up-dating my computer to a new operating-system has done. All is running speedier, and more stable than before. Oh, why did I put it off?!

17th December 2017: Best First Cup Of Tea / Friend, Different Context / Jah Wobble / The Christopher Centre

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the best first cup of tea for a long while. Earl Grey. Milk. Without planning, turning to take a small sip, ending up drinking close to the full cup in one set of excited but reigned in gulps. Reigned in the savour the pleasure. Perfect temperature. Almost disappointment as the cup is finished, knowing it cannot be repeated for a while. But never quite reaching that feeling, stopping at the line - a delicious memory.

for sharing time with a wonderful friend who I haven’t seen for a while, in a different home, and a different context. It was lovely to meet their mother properly too. It was great to share ideas around music, as well as other things.

for Jah Wobble (and Nippon Dub Ensemble)’s album, Japanese Dub.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zliqwe_taaE

for the work that runs through, and the people supporting The Christopher Centre (Sudbury, Suffolk.)
http://christophercentre.org.uk/

16th December 2017: TQ - Issue 6 / Heart Of A Dog / Vibe 2pac Biography

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for TQ - Issue 6! I encourage all to give TQ zine a look, it’s an enterprise made with a lot of heart.

for the film, Heart Of A Dog, by Laurie Anderson. Forever, Lolabelle! Such a beautiful expression. It makes me feel understood and hopeful, about things I’m not nearly as capable of expressing at the moment.

for a wonderful Vibe 2pac Biography my friend Mike got me, a good 17 years ago, containing this ridiculous image - inappropriate bathing attire.



 

15th December 2017: Day Out With My Mum & Aunt / Deep, Grey Clouds & Heavy Rain / A Loving Upbringing

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for sharing time with my Aunt and Uncle, with my Mum today.

for deep, grey clouds and heavy rain - its therapy.

for knowing a loving upbringing is extremely important, not just loving behaviour towards the child, but for all whom the parents/guardians interact with, because that child will learn it all, subconsciously first and in other ways onwards. I’m thankful for all the loving and caring parents/guardians.

14th December 2017: Breakthroughs / Political Punditry / Rubbing Dry, Cracked Lips

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for important breakthroughs in my counselling session.

for recognising I have been digesting an unhealthy amount of commercial political punditry recently. May I have the strength to regulate this behaviour.

for the sensation of rubbing dry, cracked lips on one another.

13th December 2017: Cynicism Checked / In A Character / Classic Story

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for having my cynicism checked.

for spending time immersed in a character.

for the classic story set-up of protagonists investigating an 'experiment gone wrong' in an Arctic / Antarctic station.

12th December 2017: New Life / Baader-Meinhof / Conclusions

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for my friends welcoming their baby daughter to the world today.

for the Baader-Meinhof effect, and variations on the idea.

for a distressing situation reaching a positive conclusion for a friend.

11th December 2017: Metadata / Breakthrough Against HD / Phone Call

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the specific feelings of clarity and mystery gleamed from certain metadata.

for the breakthrough towards the defeat of Huntington’s Disease.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-42308341

for an open and though call with a close friend.

10th December 2017: I Made This / Snow / Anchovies

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the ‘I made this’ child’s voice ident on 90s TV programming - a vivid transporting magic.

for the changed garden

 
for anchovies

9th December 2017: Welsh Accent / Winter Dressing Gown / Chinese Food / Surprise Call

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for the pronunciation of Mulder and Scully here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEhpmuXHmRQ

for my winter dressing-gown.

for Chinese food.

for a surprise call from my good friend in Vietnam.

8th December 2017: Recording / Alter A Space / Aunt Titty

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for getting some recording done I’ve been meaning to get done for a couple of days.

for people who are confident enough to alter a space, fuck a space up, contest negative dynamics (physical, virtual, philosophical). for people who want to, but haven’t found their confidence or language yet.

for remembering my late aunt Jane, that she was known to me as Aunt Titty. She prescribed the nickname.

7th December 2017: Martha Spurrier / Renewing Collaboration / More energised

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

to discover Martha Spurrier, and her thoughtful and clear ideas.

for the enthusiasm of a talented musician, renewing contact on a collaborative idea.

for feeling a little more energised. I wonder how much the mechanisms around my thyroid had been slowing me up. Early days, to be monitored. The body and mind is ongoing cookery.

6th December 2017: Collaborating With Strangers / Soft Sadness / Firefighters

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for collaborating instinctively and successfully with strangers.

for feeling a slight sadness; gentle enough to reflect, soft enough not to get in the way of hope.

for the particular skills and character qualities of firefighters.

5th December 2017: Levothyrozine Sodium / Earworms / Turner Prize

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for Levothyrozine Sodium.

for the mystery of earworms, the exploration for the origin of particular earworms

for the Turner Prize exhibition continuing to be centred in places outside of  London. I’m quite moved by a lot on the short list. I find arbitrary competition in art and culture insane - to each their needs etc... Long  may all their work continue!

4th December 2017: Life's Short / Co-Op 'Best Before' Scheme / Advent Calendars / White Helmet Rescue Workers

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for a more acute feeling that life is short, but without the anxiety that normally comes with that. More of a thrilling sensation.

for the Co-op embracing this ‘best before’ idea - to save on waste, but may it also help those who are struggling too. It’s a bandage (not without its political contradictions). Nationalised Supermarket Now!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-42217026

for Advent Calendars. Mine is cheap as chips, and brings me happiness.

for White Helmet's Rescue workers.

3rd December 2017: Britney / Musical Life / Private Listening

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for Britney having found a very particular and interesting magic key

for the musical life/expression of musicians being a useful, accessible metaphor to understanding how a person can change in the moment, over time, react laterally. Moving up or down, various other directions, to a subjective idea of judgement.

for being privileged to and trusted with some private listening.

2nd December 2017: Archives / Anti-US Tax Bill / Catch-Up With Friends

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for Archives being released. It's a wonderful project that frames Neil's work superbly and makes something new beyond an already incredible life in music. It's hard not to get lost in this library.

for those dedicated and committed to redistributing wealth and resources in spite of the tragic US Tax Bill just passed.

for a lovely evening catching up with good friends.

1st December 2017: An Assumption Exposed / Neil Young & The Promise Of The Real / James Baldwin

Today, I am thankful / grateful,

for having an assumption I made exposed, and gently humiliated.

for Neil Young, and The Promise Of The Real, and for the name The Promise Of The Real, for the choice of words next to one another The-Promise-of-The-Real.

to remember James Baldwin